013 ∞ AUDIO

[designedtoparty]

[Nathan is curled up in bed, so his voice is slightly muffled by his covers.]

Okay, so is anyone else getting any more of those pains that were going on before we managed to get rid of those harpies? Or am I the lucky winner here? [He says 'we'. In reality he didn't do anything to help.]

Fuck. I think this actually feels worse than getting impaled to begin with.

[A pause and some creaking as Nathan shifts on his mattress.]

I think there's still bird shit in my bed. Those bastards better not have given me bird flu, or something.

Comments

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Oh, Christ, Nathan, how many times've you died? Is it doin' all of them, this pains thing, or is it just focussing on one?

[designedtoparty]

Two. I think.

I mean, I've died three times, but I think it's just focussing on the impaling. Remind me not to go that way again.

[That would possibly be funnier if this didn't hurt so much.]

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

You were impaled? And what are birds doing in your bedroom?

[designedtoparty]

Twice! You could almost call it a hobby of mine.

You remember that bird curse the other day?

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

Ouch. That's not good for you, you know.

Oh. Washing the sheets would be a good plan. Cause... ew.

[designedtoparty]

Trust me. I'm well aware. First hand experience and everything.

Yeah, I know. I just haven't got around to it yet.

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Aye, you'd best lay off the bein' impaled. I'm no sure it's good for you. I think y' might have a serious problem.

Have y' tried drugs wi' it yet?

[designedtoparty]

Hey, try telling that to the impalers. If anyone has a problem, it's them.

Weed, booze and aspirin. Okay, so I haven't added booze to the mix yet, but it doesn't seem as helpful this time.

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Maybe y' should hang out wi' different people.

Y' thought of using something stronger?

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

You must frequent hospitals a lot too, I mean with all the impaling and the healing.

Busy with other things, huh? Me too.

[designedtoparty]

Lucky for me there's not much choice here.

Not yet. I thought'd it'd stopped. Only started back up again today.

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Aye, well, don't worry, I'm not feeling any sudden urges t' go and impale you, so that's one person t' no have t' worry about at least.

Well, it cannae be pleasant, so I'd find something soon. I'll get you something if it's too bad t' move.

[designedtoparty]

Nah. I haven't been in hospital since I was about ten and this fat kid pushed me off the climbing frame 'cause I told him I was doing his mum.

Not really. Unless getting clingy parrots to fuck off is in your definition of busy. I'm guessing not?

[orangetoughguy]

....What's wrong with you?

[designedtoparty]

Who's accusing you? You're just going to make me more suspicious now.

[Pause.] What'd you get me? There's no way I'm moving right now.

[designedtoparty]

What, apart from the whole feel like I'm dying thing, you mean?

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

How do you survive being impaled then??

Oh, just don't think a clean bed is a priority?

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Naebody's accusing me! I'm just saying, and I didnae know y' were suspicious a' me in the first place. Suspicious a' what?

I dunno, I was just thinking a' going t' the hospital and telling them my pal's got the ghost pains, see if I can get some painkillers off them.

[designedtoparty]

Who says I have to survive anything? I'm immortal.

When it's shit, sure. I'm just lazy. It's only been a few days.

[designedtoparty]

All right, man. Calm down. I joking, all right?

You know, I tried that at home once. Almost got arrested. Although maybe they'd be a bit more understanding here.

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

Ohhh Immortal. That's cheating.

And still, ew.

[designedtoparty]

And that's you being jealous I have a cool power.

Hey, whatever. I'll wash them as soon as I can move again. You said you've been busy. Are you sure you'd have found the time to wash your sheets if you'd been in my place?

[Voice;]

[withloadedguns.livejournal.com]

I guess everyone has to win sometime.

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Well, aye, cos y' really HAVE got them. So it's no a trick.

[the-dawnster.livejournal.com]

Well yeah, who wouldn't want to be all I can live through anything when they're constantly in mortal danger? Duh. What brand of immortal are you?

If I had a choice between clean sheets and bird poop sheets then I'd pick the clean sheets. There's no question. I'd make the time. If there isn't a choice, you make do with what you have. I get that too. But I guess if you can't move, I could make the time to wash your sheets for you so you aren't sleeping in poop.