002 ∞ VIDEO

[designedtoparty]

[Hello, City. Today you are being treated to a lovely view of a scrawny, still kind of malnourished Nathan in nothing but his briefs. Should you be pleased? Well, he certainly seems to think so.]

Deities! Or anyone else who knows their way around a washing machine. I have an irresistible offer for you to take me up on.

Since my flatmate refuses to do my laundry for me, I've been left with no choice but to resort to other means.

What are these other means, you might ask. To which I respond, this. [Nathan trails his hands sloooowwwwwwwly down his torso, hands coming to a rest just above his crotch.]

That's right. In exchange for washing my clothes, I offer you my body, to do with as you wish. This will be an ongoing agreement, naturally. Unless your services aren't up to my standards, in which case I reserve the right to put a stop to any agreement we might have.

Comments

1/1 IF I HAD A FACEPALM ICON I WOULD USE IT

[heelsandlaw.livejournal.com]

[knifecushion.livejournal.com]

My virgin eyes are going to bleed.

video; 1/?

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

[Campbell thinks this is the funniest shit ever on one side and on the other side.....maybe....it's a good idea?]

You don't think that'll actually work, do you?

video; 2/3

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

I mean, will it?

sdfjfjk SORRY FOR ALL THE EDITS. I am awesome, clearly.

[designedtoparty]

That's right. Feast your eyes, like the dirty prosecutor you are.

video; 3/3

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Has it? Cos I've just been washing my clothes in the sink if they need it. [Read as: once. So far.]

[heelsandlaw.livejournal.com]

There is so much wrong with you this.

[designedtoparty]

And yet it's so hard to look away.

1/2

[trollsbackwards.livejournal.com]

[ the fuck is this douchebag getting at? Karkat doesn't get it. ]

video;

[designedtoparty]

I don't know. I've never had to resort to this before. It's just something I'm trying out.

[knifecushion.livejournal.com]

No, it's pretty easy, actually. [HAND OVER THE DEVICE]

[designedtoparty]

So much wrong, it's almost right.

[trollsbackwards.livejournal.com]

[ no, seriously. he doesn't understand what's going on here. so he's going to watch for a bit. ]

[designedtoparty]

[POUT.] You just can't appreciate true beauty.

video;

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Can y' tell me if it does? Sounds like killing two birds wi' one stone, that. If it works, o' course. And it doesnae just alienate every girl in the City.

[knifecushion.livejournal.com]

[gonna keep his hand there for the duration of this conversation, yup.]

I appreciate that you are probably a sex offender. Or you spent your childhood eating glue.

[eagleofautozam.livejournal.com]

I think you will have to learn to do your own laundry!

[innocentxcharm.livejournal.com]

Your body? Why would people want your body?

[designedtoparty]

[Nathan's moved onto rubbing his legs. JUST BECAUSE HE CAN.]

[trollsbackwards.livejournal.com]

[ this face. just... just what the fuck. ]

[designedtoparty]

Hey, I've never had to do my own laundry! I have no intention of starting now.

[designedtoparty]

So they can commit all kinds of unspeakable acts on it.

[designedtoparty]

[Probably for the best, Fran.]

Neither. Although I was sexually abused as a child. And I have occasionally been known to sniff glue.

[eagleofautozam.livejournal.com]

Maybe the city has a cleaners you could go to then…?

[Obviously thinks your offer won’t work. ]

video;

[designedtoparty]

Sure, man. Just hang back until I've sorted something, yeah? It was my idea, so it's only fair that I get first dibs.