designedtoparty | 001 ∞ VIDEO

[The video opens with a bewildered looking youth in a grubby, orange jumpsuit holding the camera at arms length. When he speaks, the Irish accent quickly becomes apparent.]

Okay, first off I'd like to thank whoever conveniently decided to leave me with some form of communication, even if it is utterly useless for getting in touch with people I actually care about.

Second? A big fuck you to whoever's fault it is that I appear to be stuck here. I mean, come on! What the fuck!? Clearly I'm not dead, because hello? Immortal. So, what could possibly be going on here?

[At that he drops the confused look, rolling his eyes and looking annoyed instead.]

Oh, wait. Of course! It's something to do with the storm. Which is just a shocker, I know. It's not like that happens every week, or anything.

[A beat. Just waiting for that sarcasm to sink in, then...]

Ohhhhhh, no, sorry. It does. So, I know exactly what's going on here. It's someone's fucked up idea of a super power. Which means you're either a beautiful, barely legal girl, planning on doing something horrible to me, or...

[Nathan gasps, eyes widening with 'realisation'.]

You!

You're the probation worker. You sick bastard! I thought I could trust you. For once, I thought we had a probation worker we could trust. To guide us, to reform us, to refrain from trying to brutally murder us...

Instead you're pulling me into your sick, perverted fantasies, so you can have your filthy way with me.

[Throwing a dramatic arm over his face, Nathan lets out a loud, false sob.]

Be gentle with me. No one's ever taken me that way before.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's the truth.

I draw the line at feedin' strangers, thanks.

Right. Well, would it be possible to give me the name of this city?

I never said anything about feeding! Although that would be helpful, too, now you mention it.

That's what the name is. The City.

I'm makin' boxty. Will yeh eat it?

Well, that's a ridiculous name. How am I supposed to work out where that is?

Boxty! Sure. Why not? [A pause.] Are you seriously going to feed me?

Edited 2011-01-30 22:19 (UTC)

It's not anywhere near Ireland, or England.

I already feed a bloody army, it feels, might as well feed yeh too.

Anywhere it is near to, or...?

Oh. Cool. So, this means you're doing my laundry, yeah?

It's not close to anythin'.

No.

So, essentially I'm stuck here?

Oh, come on! I don't know how to do it. Do you expect me to go around wearing dirty clothes all the time?

Yeah, yeh're stuck.

I'll show yeh how to use a laundry but that's as much as I'll do.

No, that's okay. I'll just find someone else to do it. [Yes, he does sound utterly dejected.]

Do you at least have a spare couch I could use? Or has this army of yours filled up all the bed space already?

Tell me yehr name, first.

Nathan. Nathan Young.

...You didn't tell me your name, right?

Eden Mac Cionaoith.

....yeah, I got space for yeh.

Edited 2011-01-30 22:46 (UTC)

[Now he's got somewhere to stay, Nathan's quick to perk up again.] Eden. Cool. Right.

Thanks, Eden. So, is this your couch, or am I lucky enough to be worthy of spare room status?

Without Jessica about, yeh might as well get her room.

Nice one.

And if this Jessica is ever about again... Well, I'm than happy to take the couch. Or share. I'm really not that fussy.

We'll see how it goes, how about that, boyo?

That sounds fine. Completely fine.

Sooo, how about you tell me where you live? That way I can try and find you, so you can fully appreciate me in person.

I'll find yeh. What do yeh see?

I see a carousel. Big, ridiculous looking thing. You can't miss it.

Unless you have a lot of those here, in which case you could probably easily miss it.

I know where that is. Sit still, yeah? I'll be right there.

I won't move a muscle. Don't you worry.

[Action?]

[Nathan's just going to relax whilst he's waiting, sticking on his iPod and rolling a nice joint to pass the time with.]

[It takes her about fifteen minutes, and she spots him after looking for a couple of minutes. She heads over his direction, and watches him roll the joint]

Oy.

[Nathan's just lighting up at that point. He can just about recognise the voice over his music. He turned it down especially, which is unusually considerate of him. He tugs out his headphones, raising his eyebrows as he offers the joint out to her.]

What, did you want some?

[She shakes her head]

Thanks. Nathan, yeah?

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