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[designedtoparty]

In Loving Memory
Nathan Young
1989 - 3000

Who turned out to not be so immortal after all.
Gored up the anus with a red hot poker by midgets
who could not take his promiscuity anymore.

Sadly missed by all but one of his many
tri-breasted wives and mutant children.

You know, I have a proper one of these my mum wrote for me. It was a lot more thoughtful than this one. And probably a lot more expensive, seeing how it was done in marble and everything.

Comments

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

That's not really a power, though, is it? That's just...not dying.

[designedtoparty]

What? Of course it's a power! I got it in a freak storm.

How much more comic book can you get?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

I guess. I always thought of powers as stuff you can do.

[designedtoparty]

I can come back from the dead. That's doing something.

Who cares about walking through walls or whatever when you can pull shit like that?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

Oh. Yeah, that is.

Walking through walls doesn't sound that interesting anyway.

[designedtoparty]

Right, exactly! I struck gold.

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

[...]

Did it hurt?

[designedtoparty]

Dying? Yeah. I'm telling you now, it's some scary shit. Like a tiger trying to maul your cock off.

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

...that sounds pretty bad. What happened?

[designedtoparty]

First time I fell off a building. Then I got shoved onto a pipe some twat left sticking out of a wall.

I can't say either was especially pleasant. I usually try and avoid it, if I can.

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

How come your life's so dangerous?

[designedtoparty]

I don't know. I'll just ask next time someone tries to murder me, shall I?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

You think it's going to happen again?

[designedtoparty]

[A beat.]

You do know the meaning of the word 'sarcasm', don't you?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

I know what sarcasm is. But where I was before the City, I fought dangerous stuff all the time. I thought maybe you did something like that too.

[designedtoparty]

Like I say, when you've got a power, weird stuffs throws itself at you all the time. If it were up to me, I'd just use my powers to get rich and leave it at that.

You got a power, or do you actually get off on that hero bullshit?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

I guess so. I've got the Keyblade, and I can do some magic.

[designedtoparty]

Keyblade? Isn't that when you stick your key between your fingers before you punch someone?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

Uh, no...it's like a sword, I guess, but a key.

[designedtoparty]

So... it's basically an oversized key?

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

Kind of. In a way.

[designedtoparty]

And you say immortality isn't a power. That's shit. You're lucky you've got magic, or whatever, to make up for it.

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

I use the Keyblade more than I do magic. It works a lot better against the Heartless.

[designedtoparty]

Yeah, so? I use fire extinguishers against my probation workers more than I do immortality, that doesn't make it a super power. No need to get arsey about it.

[binarysky.livejournal.com]

'Arsey'?