designedtoparty: (yours forever...)
Nathan Young ([personal profile] designedtoparty) wrote2011-11-20 07:48 pm

030 ∞ TEXT

Alisha had always loved sex. You only needed to speak to her for five minutes to work that one out. Or just make physical contact if you wanted to cut right down to the chase. How else would you explain the reason behind her ability to inflict uncontrollable urges onto anyone she went near?

But anyway, the point was she'd found herself wanting to shag Barry. He was practically a virgin and anyone with a pair of eyes could see why. He was short and pale with the sort of stare that followed any sane man into his nightmares. Yet one glance from him and Alisha found herself soaking her knickers, and just to be clear, we aren't talking urine here.

She'd always preferred failed athletes in the past, so she had no idea where this was coming from. Still, she thought he was kind of hot in a weird, creepy sort of way, so she guessed she must have a thing for obvious serial killers in the making too.

One day when Alisha couldn't take it any longer she pulled Barry off to one side and shoved her hand against his throat. Barry tensed, eyes psychotic as he wheezed out yet another of his deepest, darkest sex fantasies.

"I want to dissect your skull and fuck you in the brain," he snarled in a tone so monstrous Alisha was sure he must be serious. She'd hoped whatever freaky shit he came out with would put her off, but instead Alisha found herself incredibly turned on and fucked him there and then. Lucky for both of them, Barry resisted the urge to go through with his fetishes and after they even agreed to go out as long as Barry was restrained for all further sexual endeavours. Alisha liked what there was of her brains and Barry probably got off on that bondage shit anyway.
awkwards: (it's funny how i find myself)

lmao oh my god it made me laugh so hard. just as this tag did. ♥

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-23 12:12 am (UTC)(link)
[ ... ]

You know d is for dickhead, right?
awkwards: (the more i see the less i know)

/marries i am now officially mrs twat

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-23 12:31 am (UTC)(link)
[ Unamused face and total deadpan: ] You're neither of those things.
awkwards: (that's not what we're saying)

yes, i believe it does!

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-23 12:42 am (UTC)(link)
In your dreams. Which will never come true.
awkwards: (ain't it a funny thing)

Mr Tart and Mrs Twat formally invite you to their tacky wedding ♥

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 09:33 am (UTC)(link)
They're your dreams. Immediately cancels out the plausible.

I don't need a power to know you're dreams are completely fucked up.
awkwards: (i just want you back for good)

and we can deny deny deny. only the pretty people in orange can come in!

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 10:28 am (UTC)(link)
They're yours. Instantly fucked.

[ ... lmao grin ] Did you fancy your PE teacher?
awkwards: (vulnerable)

... (unsure)

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 10:59 am (UTC)(link)
Then why did you dream of shagging her, then? Maybe you fancied her on some level?
awkwards: (were you having a wank in there?)

i only want you /cheesy

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 11:23 am (UTC)(link)
I don't know who's going to need the therapy more. You or me. [ :| ]

Seriously, have you not spoken to anyone about the shit you claim others do?
awkwards: (i wake to no peace of mind)

;o; good, because the invites were going to be lost in the mail!

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 11:38 am (UTC)(link)
Why? Didn't you tell the truth?
awkwards: (nasty)

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 11:49 am (UTC)(link)
And you wonder why we don't believe a word you say.

Do you honestly think about shit before you say it?
awkwards: (i wake to no peace of mind)

DYING. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE IT. I'M FRAMING THAT AND PUTTING IT ON THE FRIDGE!

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 12:12 pm (UTC)(link)
So, you're saying you did it for your mum? [ Strangely nice ... ]
awkwards: (coming out of the water)

funny, here i was thinking you were so beautiful to me ...

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 12:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, did you tell her you were looking out for her? In your prickish way of yours.
awkwards: (we like when we are spinning)

i paved it with my sexy intentions

[personal profile] awkwards 2011-11-24 12:48 pm (UTC)(link)
How did you tell her?

(gyay)

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i loled :D. also, keywords.

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