015 ∞ VIDEO

[designedtoparty]

[Here is Nathan, sporting a very expensive looking suit (stolen by someone who wasn't him, thank you very much) and looking extremely worked up about something.]

Hey! Hey, cop fellers. Since you're always so keen to get on my back over nothing, I thought you might like to deal with some real crime for a change. I know you were too wrapped up with other, no doubt more important stuff to bother the last time I got murdered, but maybe this time you could try doing your jobs for a change.

So I got stabbed, right? I don't know what I got stabbed with, mind. It might have been sword, or something. I'm kind of fuzzy here, so it's hard to say for sure.

Anyway, that bit's all fine. Not that I want people to kill me, but stabbing's fairly tame. Only this guy must've been completely insane. I woke up, and my clothes were just gone. He'd put me in this thing instead. [He tugs at the lapels of his suit jacket here, then continues with his rant.] And he had the indecency to dump a load of newspaper over my head and leaving me lying around outside.

I don't want to start throwing around accusations, or anything, but I reckon this guy must've violated me while I was out. He's probably out there right now, rubbing his dick all over my t-shirt and getting off on his memories of skull fucking me.

He left chewing gum in my pockets, for God's sake. If that isn't a sign of guilt, I don't know what is.

Comments

ANONYMOUS VIDEO ATTACHMENT

[renegare.livejournal.com]

[ .....of Nathan's clothing burning on a heap of newspapers, somewhere in a back alley. ]

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[taravata.livejournal.com]

You ain't remembering nothing?

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[designedtoparty]

I got stabbed by some guy with a sword. How much am I going to remember after that?

[Voice;]

[withloadedguns.livejournal.com]

At least you're alive.

Again.

[Voice;]

[designedtoparty]

Which is always a plus.

Hey. Do you still want to go ahead with us shooting each other?

[valentineluke.livejournal.com]

Quite the stretch of a drunken one night stand into a tall tale.

[designedtoparty]

It's not tall! It's completely true. I hadn't even been drinking.

[dulcisnuntius.livejournal.com]

You died? Who did it? When?

[Yeah, Dulcie's kicked into motherhen mode a little.]</small

[designedtoparty]

You know, answering tends to be easier when you don't ask everything at once.

[eiremagic]

Yeh were raped?

[designedtoparty]

That part's entirely speculative. Strangely enough, I don't actually remember what happens after I die.

[1/2]

[heelsandlaw.livejournal.com]

Does it count as murder when you're not really dead?

[2/2]

[heelsandlaw.livejournal.com]

Would you like to file a report?

1/??

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

PS. THESE DON'T EXIST

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

DONE; THIS POST ILU

[makinghoscroak.livejournal.com]

[Tl;dr Shira bein' offended Nathan would DARE publish such slander...Shira's standards for molestation are totally higher than this 8(]

[orangetoughguy]

It's okay to like wearing suits, no one's gonna judge you so you can cool it with the tabloid stories.

[designedtoparty]

I don't like wearing them. You don't think I'd have found a job in an office by now if I did?

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[adamantined]

askldjasldf What?

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[designedtoparty]

You heard me. If you don't get it, just go back and watch it again.

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[7thborn.livejournal.com]

And to think summer was my favourite season. Why does this keep

A sword, not a long knife or a dagger, right?

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[designedtoparty]

Does it matter?

[feellikejumping.livejournal.com]

Right. First thing first... if you really want to file a complaint, we'll need for you to go to hospital and have them examine you for signs of your 'alleged' assault.

[designedtoparty]

I'm immortal. I have no stab wound, no scar... anything else he did to me probably healed over whenever that did.

[loonyandproud.livejournal.com]

Somebody killed you...and put you inna suit?

[designedtoparty]

Yeah. Weird, right?

Not even my mum did that for me.